The uniforms have been worn, the new shoes have already picked up a few scuffs, and the excitement (or nerves!) of the first day back at school has passed. Children and young people have now been back at school for a few weeks, and for many families, September is beginning to feel a little more normal again.
But that doesn’t necessarily mean everyone has completely settled in.
Getting back into the school routine after the long summer holidays can take time. Early mornings, full school days, homework, clubs and earlier bedtimes are a big adjustment after several weeks of having more freedom. Even children who were excited to return to school can find the change tiring.
If your household is still finding its feet, you’re certainly not alone.
Why It Can Take Time To Settle Back In
Six weeks is a long time in a child’s world. During the summer holidays, routines often become much more relaxed. Bedtimes may get later, mornings slower and mealtimes less structured. There may also be fewer demands on children’s attention and concentration.
Going back to school suddenly changes all of that.
Children need to get up at a certain time, get dressed and ready, arrive at school on time, concentrate for several hours, navigate friendships and follow classroom expectations. Then they come home and may still have homework, activities or other responsibilities.
That can be exhausting, particularly during the first few weeks.
You might notice your child seems more tired, emotional, irritable or hungry than usual. Younger children may need more reassurance or become clingier at home, while older children and teenagers might want more time alone after school.
Sometimes, home is simply where children feel safe enough to let out everything they have been holding together during the school day.
Keep The Routine Predictable
One of the simplest ways to make the transition easier is to keep things as predictable as possible.
You don’t need a minute-by-minute family timetable. A few regular points throughout the day can be enough to help children know what to expect.
Try to keep wake-up times, meals and bedtimes reasonably consistent during the school week. Preparing bags, uniforms and anything else needed for school the night before can also make mornings much less stressful.
For younger children, talking through what will happen the next day can be helpful. Older children and teenagers may benefit from having more responsibility for their own routine, while still knowing that support is there when they need it.
Make Space For Downtime
After spending all day listening, learning, socialising and following instructions, children may need some time to decompress when they get home.
That might mean having a snack and watching television, playing outside, doing something creative, listening to music, gaming or simply having some quiet time.
There can be a temptation to immediately ask lots of questions about the school day, particularly if your child has recently started a new school or class. But not every child wants to talk as soon as they walk through the door.
Giving them a little space first may mean they are much more willing to chat later.
Don’t Fill Every Afternoon
Once the school year gets going, the calendar can quickly start filling up again. Sports, clubs, homework, appointments and other activities can leave children with very little genuinely free time.
Activities can be brilliant for helping children develop skills, build confidence and make friends, but downtime matters too.
If your child seems particularly exhausted at the moment, consider whether they need a quieter evening or weekend. They don’t have to be productive every minute of the day.
Sometimes an afternoon spent doing very little is exactly what they need.
Remember That Sleep Matters
Getting enough sleep can make a huge difference to how children cope with the school day.
If bedtime drifted later during the summer holidays and hasn’t quite returned to normal yet, gradually bringing it forward can be easier than trying to make a dramatic change overnight.
A predictable bedtime routine can help younger children wind down, while older children and teenagers may benefit from having a clear point when the day begins to slow down.
And, although it isn’t always easy, reducing screens immediately before bed may make it easier to switch off and settle.
Look Beyond “How Was School?”
If you’ve ever asked “How was school?” only to receive “fine” as the entire answer, you’re definitely not the only parent or carer.
More specific questions can make conversations easier.
You could ask what made them laugh that day, who they spent break time with, what the best part of lunch was, what they found difficult or what they are looking forward to tomorrow.
For teenagers in particular, conversations don’t always happen when adults plan them. They might suddenly start talking while you’re in the car, making dinner or doing something else together. Being available without forcing the conversation can make it easier for them to open up.
Watch For Signs They’re Struggling
Some tiredness and grumpiness can be expected while everyone readjusts, but keep an eye on changes that continue or seem to be getting worse.
A child who regularly says they don’t want to go to school, becomes very distressed before school, stops enjoying things they normally like or seems particularly worried about friendships or lessons may need some extra support.
Talking to them is a good starting point. Depending on what is happening, you may also want to speak to their teacher, form tutor or another appropriate member of school staff.
Children don’t always have the words to explain exactly what is wrong, so changes in behaviour can sometimes tell us that they need help.
Make Time For Fun And Connection
The school routine isn’t only about getting everyone out of the door on time and remembering PE kits.
Children and young people still need opportunities to play, relax, see friends and enjoy themselves outside school. Having something to look forward to can be especially valuable when the school week feels long.
That’s one of the reasons community spaces and youth activities matter.
At RUSH 2The DEN, we want children and young people to have somewhere they can spend time with others without the pressures of lessons, homework or grades. It’s a chance to have fun, try different activities, build friendships and simply enjoy being themselves.
Give Yourselves Time
By this point in September, it can feel as though everyone should have settled back into school life. In reality, there isn’t a deadline.
Some children bounce straight back into the routine. Others need several weeks to adjust, particularly if they have started a new school, moved into a new class, experienced changes in their friendship group or are facing new academic expectations.
And parents and carers are adjusting too. Getting everyone fed, dressed, organised and where they need to be every day is a routine in itself.
So, if September still feels slightly chaotic in your household, that’s OK. Keep the basics consistent, make room for rest and connection, and give everyone a little more time to find their rhythm.
The school year has only just begun.